I was making an outbound call to a new customer. He had submitted a paper application with us, and he indicated he was moving to us from a different fund. He hadn't put down the details of his previosu fund and we do require that, it affects what they can claim on etc. So I called him to get this info and this is the convo that just occurred...

Me - "Hi, this is *me* calling from Health Insurance Inc, was I speaking with *customer*?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes, speaking, how can I help you?"

Me - "I was just calling to confirm a few details from the application you recently submitted to us. It says here you came from a previous fund, but it looks like you overlooked filling in that section. Is it ok if I grab a few of those details so I can get your appliaction through for your sir?"

Stupid Customer - "Sure, shoot"

Me - "Thanks sir. So firstly, what was the name of the fund you can from?"

Stupid Customer - "Oh, I just had it all filed under 'my health cover'. I dodn;t give it an official name or anything"

Me - "Oh, okay. And what was the name of the health insurance company you are coming across from?"

Stupid Customer - "Nar, I dont run a business or anything, it was just my personal insurance"

Me, trying a different tact - "Okay. What was the name or type of the policy you had?"

[policy names are unique, I can use that to ID which fund it was]

Stupid Customer - "Just a single one"

Me - "Right. but what was the name or type of cover you had? The policy would have had an official name?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, I told ya. 'My health cover'."

Me - "Okay. Well, do you know how much you paid each month?"

Stupid Custoemr - "Nar"

Me - "Okay sir. So to confirm, you can't actually tell you the name of the company you held insurance with or the name of the policy you had?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, yeah I already told ya. I filed it under 'my health cover', and I'm just a normal worker, I don't own no business or nothin'"

Me - "Okay sir. Well, thanks for your time, you have a great day now"


Riiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
I have concerns about how he manages to get through each day  O___O

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, I got a letter saying you weren't paying on my claims for glasses?"

*I bring up the policy, have a look at the claim...*

Me - "Thanks for waiting ma'am. Okay, so I can see that we advised on your letter there that you have already claimed back your maximum 2 pairs of glasses for this calander year, so you have reached your limit. You will be able to claim again though from 1 Janurary"

Stupid Customer, suddenly psycho - "NO! What the f*ck do you mean my limit has been reached?! I don't HAVE a limit!"

Me - "Er, yes, yes you do ma'am. As per all of the documentation we send you, and the nformation through the website and advertising, you are capped at claiming two pairs of glasses per calander year"

Stupid Customer - "You know what, you're going to be sorry for this!"... *CLICK*

A few minutes pass, and then I get another call...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "My wife called in a few minutes ago and some b*tch called her a dog and lied about her having some stupid limit on her glasses?"

*I bring up the details he provides...yep...it's her husband*

Me - "Okay sir. Well it was actually myself your wife spoke with. I certainly did not call her any names, and yes, it is correct that she has a yearly limit on glasses":

Stupid Customer - "No, she told me you called her a dog! I want to speak to a manager!"

*I can hear her in the background screaming at him to 'get her, get her!*

Me - "Certainly sir, I can pass the call through to have a manager listen to what was said and then call you back with the outcome"

*He relays this to his wife in the background...she starts screaming again, only this time...*

Stupid Customer - "Yeah....nar she said she isn't going to waste her time with that kind of rubbish, she is an important person and has better things to do than this!"...*CLICK*


Never fails to put them in their place, reminding them that all calls are recorded...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Ahhh, yes. Yes. I'm calling with an enquiry"

Me - "Okay ma'am, what was your enquriy today?"

Stuipd Customer - "................."

Me - "Hello? Ma'am? Are you there?"

Stupid Customer - ""Don't yell at me!"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am, I don't believe my voice was raised at all. how could I help you today?"

Stupid Customer - 'I told you! I have an enquiry!"

Me - "Yes ma'am, and what was your enquiry?

Stupid Customer - "...................."

Me, in a deliberately quieter voice - "Ma'am, are you still there? What was your enquiry today?"

Stupid Customer - "Why do you keep asking me that!"

Me - "I'm sorry, I don't quite understand. Did you have an enquiry for me today?"

Stupid Customer - "YES! How many times do I have to say it!"

Me - "Okay. But what was your enquiry?"

Stupid Customer - "I don't get what you mean! Stop repeating that! I have an enquiry!"

Me - "Okay ma'am, and I just need for you to tell me what your enquiry actually was to be able to assist you"

Stupid Customer - "How should I know that? That's your job!"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "Are you deaf? The telephone said to press '2' if I had an enquiry!"

Me - "Okay....."

Stupid Customer - "What is an enquiry anyway?"

Me - "Um....pardon ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "Oh you're just an idiot! You don't know anything, I'm not wasting my time with you"... *CLICK*

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Well first let me tell you that I'm not happy, okay? I hope you're ready because you're about to be abused like you've never been abused before, I'm going to tear you a new a*shole, okay?"

Me - "Right, so what can I do for you today sir?"

Stupid Customer - "I've had to call you people about 15 times in the past two days to get a claim paid, and here I am again, wasting my time calling you people, and I tell you what, I've had enough, okay? It's beyond a joke now and I'm about to make sure this is the worst call you've ever had"

Me - 'Okay, what was your membership nubmer?"

*I bring up his policy and read through alllllll the notes*

Me - "Okay sir, so I can see here that you've called a fair few times about a dental claim, and ..."

*interrupts me*

Stupid Customer - "A few times? A few times?1 I've had to call you f*ckwits almost 20 times in just 2 days! So you've got my file there, what does it say?"

Me - "Yes sir, I've got your details here. The notes state that the claim had been delayed initially as we were waiting on further information on the dentist so we could properly process your claim, and that we received that information yesterday afternoon and that the claim should now be processed and the money in your account within 3 working days. Well sir, I mean, that was yesterday...it has not been 3 working days yet...so how could I help with this for you today?"

Stupid Customer - "How can you help me? Is that what you said? Huh? How can you HELP me?"

Me - "Yes, thats what I said sir"

Stupid Customer - "Well you can help me by getting off your a*s and paying my claim, that's how you can f*cking help me!"

Me - "Okay, well as mentioned the claim is being processed and the money should be in your bank account within now 2 working days"

Stupid Customer - "Well that's just not good enough! I demand that you give my money TODAY!"

Me - "Okay, well I'm sorry sir but that wont be possible..."

*interrupts me again*

Stupid Customer - "No no no no no, NO, no don't you start telling me this and that isn't 'possible', I know that all you gotta do is hit a few buttons on your end and I'll have my money right away. So I don't care who you gotta go speak to, but you go make it happen love, go do it right now"

Me - "Yeah, no I'm sorry sir but you've already been told the facts of the situation. To further explain, once we have processeda claim, we send a request to the bank you have on file with us and ask that they deposit the rebate amount into your bank account. I can see that we have sent that request today and so you are now just waiting for your own bank to release the funds into your account, and that process generally takes 2 working days"

Stupid Customer - "I don't care about any of your excuses, I've already told you how it's going to be so shut your mouth and go put my money into my account, I've already waited long enough for this claim to go through, you people really are f*cking hopeless, you know that right? You have a s*it job and you work for a s*hit company, I don;t know how you sleep at night"

Me - "I'm really sorry that you aren't able to understand what you're being told sir but I've already explained the facts fo the situation, and I can see form the notes that every other person you have called today has told you the exact same thing, calling us over and over wont change anything..."

*talks over me*

Stupid Customer - "Hey hey hey hey how you listen to make young lady, I'm not sure what's wrong with me but I've told you how it's going to be so like I told you before, shut your mouth and give me my money, you work for ME so go do what you're told like a good little girl, I'm done waiting for you people"

Me - "Well sir, I mean, the reason for the delay in the first place was that you sent us an incomplete receipt, so we had to wait on your own dentist to send us the missing information so we could proceed, i can see fomr the notes here that you refunsed to get that missing information yourself so we had to chase YOUR dentist, and that's the reason for the delay, so we've actually been waiting on you, not the other way around"

Stupid Customer - "Look I've already told you, I'm not interested in your excuses, shut your mouth and get me my money!"

Me - "They're not excuses sir, I'm simply stating the facts if the situation, unfortunately if you refuse to accept these facts then that is not really our problem and there is nothing more we can do for you"

Stupid Customer - "Excuse me! I'M the customer here, you work for me! I think it's time I had a little chat to your manager missy, you can't talk to a customer like this and get away with it! I hope you have alot of cash saved up because you're about to lost your job, you rude b*tch!"

*Yeaaaaaah. Every single manager here would have spoken 10 times worse to this guy...if someone abuses us then we have every right to defend ourselves and stand up for ourselves*

Me - "Okay sir, I'll pass your details through to a manager and get them to call you back to discuss your concerns"

Stupid Customer - "No you won't, you'll put me through to a manager right now!"

Me - "Sorry sir, management will want to listen to all of these calls prior to calling you back, you've been rude and abusive and they don't like that"

Stupid Customer, laughing - "Oh yeah? Whadda they gonna do, huh?"

Me - "Close your policy with us, sir"

Stupid Customer - "They can't do that!"

Me - "Actually sir, they can, I suggest you read through your terms and conditions, they are located in the policy information we send you twice a year, and also on our website"

Stupid Customer - "Whatever! So anyway, stop trying to change the subject - where's my money? I'm waiting!"

Me - "I've already told you numerous times sir that your money will be in your account in 2 working days, now I'm sorry but I have other customers waiting to get through so i will have to attend to their calls as this conversation is going no-where"

Stupid Customer - "Like hell you will!"

Me - *CLICK*


So, I mean, was I out of line in what I said and the way I spoke to him?
I know I was direct, but we have always been told here that if some moron speak to you like that, then you have every right to talk back

And I know that there are alot of people here who would have said worse things.

I think he deserved all he got and I hope his policy will get closed, which I am confident it will 

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes, hi, I just had a question about my policy?"

Me - "Sure, I'll just bring that up and have a look. What was your membership number?"

*He gives me a number that doesn't appear on our system*

Me - "Hmmm. I'm not getting a match under that one sir. I should be fine to bring it up using a name search. May I please get your first and last name please?"

Stupid Customer - "Oscar"

Me - "Okay, thanks for that sir, and just your surname now please?"

Stupid Customer - "Uh, that's a bit of a stupid question don't you think?"

Me - "Um, well, I mean, no, no I do rerequire your surname to be able to bring you up on our system, we would have quite alot of customers with the name Oscar..."

Stupid Customer - "Well I know it's a common name, but still. Well it doesn't matter anyway, there is no last name. Just Oscar"

Me - "O...kay then. Alright well I'll try with a date of birth then sir. May I please get your date of birth?"

Stupid Customer - "What is it with you and these stupid questions? How the hell am I supposed to know that!"

Me - "Uh...you don't know your date of birth sir?"

Stupid Customer - "Pft, I told you, no! I don't know how anyone can be expected to know that! look, can I ask why you're bring do difficult and un-helpful right now? I told you, I just want to check something on my policy, I JUST want to know when the next payment's due! Why is that so hard!"

Me - "I do apologise sir, but I need to ask these questions to try and locate your policy since the membership number you provided did not bring anything up. It was Health Insurance Inc that you are with, isn't it sir? You have a health insurance policy with us"

Stupid Customer - "Yes! I've had my policy with your company for about 3 years now! Just look it up okay, I told you already, my name's Oscar!"

Me - "As mentioned sir, I will need more than just a first name. Do you recall the last thing you claimed on perhaps, and I cant search via the claims history?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah it was just last week actually, I went in and got some shots done"

Me - "Okay, excellent sir, I'll bring up the pharmacy claims from the last week and we can go from there. Okay, so what type of vaccines were they?"

Stupid Customer - "It was mainly just worming shots that I got"

Me - "Oh...okay, well I mean, I know that you can claim on worming tablets that are prescription only, but for actual vaccines I'm not sure, I would need to check because I'm familiar with the tablets but not the vaccines..."

Stupid Customer - "Oh for F*CK SAKE! You're an idiot, a complete and utter idiot! Is there a manager I can speak to? Who the f*ck hasn't heard of worming shots, are you new or something? Can you get me someone who knows what they're doing?"

Me - "Okay sir. Well before I see if a manager is available, I can check one last thing that may work for us here - what was the name of the place you got the shot done at?"

Stupid Customer - "Burrows Solutions"

*I look up our list of pharmacies/clinics etc....no match*

Me - "Okay, well I'm sorry sir but I don't actually get a match on that name on our list here..."

*interrupting me*

Stupid Customer - "Oh for god sakes, you're a complete idiot, you know that? Useless, just useless. I've had enough, stop wasting my time and go get me someone who knows what they're doing"

*While he was saying that I have Googled Burrow Solutions*

Me - "Uh...just to clarify sir...I do get a match on Burrow Solutions, but it comes up as a vet?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, no sh*t! I alreayd told you, that's where I got my shots done at!"

Me - "Uh...okay, I mean...I just don't quite understand why you would be getting your vaccines done at a vet, I mean, is there a DRs clinic attached or something?"

Stupid Customer - "What? No! I TOLD you! That's where I took Oscar to get his shots! What is WRONG with you?!"

Me - "Er, I'm sorry sir...this whole time you have been referring to yourself...who may I ask is Oscar?"

Stupid Customer - "MY F*CKING DOG! I TOLD YOU ALREADY, I GOT A QUESTION ABOUT HIS POLICY!"

Me - "Right. So were you after pet insurance then?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes! I already TOLD you that!"

Me - "Yeah, sorry sir, no, no you did not. As mentioned more than once, you've called Health Insurance Inc. Health Insurance. We do not do pet insurance. You've called the wrong company. May I suggest checking the number you have dialled, and if you do get through to the right place, to not refer to yourself when speaking about your pet dog? It may allow the person answering to understand what it is you are actually talking about. Thanks for calling"    *CLICK*

What a F*CKWIT

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Hi there. Can you hear me ok?"

Me - "Yes ma'am, I can hear you fine. How can I help you?

Stupid Customer - "I just had a general question, but I can't hear you. Can you hear me?"

Me - "Yes, I can hear you. Can you hear me okay?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes. But I can't hear you"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "I said I can hear what you're saying, but it's a bad line. I can't hear anything  you're saying.  Hello?"

Me - "Okay...I'm sorry, just to clarify ma'am, can you hear me, or are you having difficulty?"

Stupid Customer - "No no, I'm not having any difficulty, I can hear you fine, but I can't hear anything you're saying, it's a bad line"

Me - "O....kay. Alright. Well, how could I help you today?"

Stupid Customer - "I just needed help with a letter I got about a claim"

Me - "Sure ma'am, whta was your member number?"

Stupid Customer - "My member number is 49910384, except I can't hear a single word you're saying"

Me - "You can't hear me again ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "That's right, I can't hear you again. Well, I haven't been able to hear a single word you've said right from when you said hi welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you"

Me - "........um.....okay....."

Stupid Customer, suddenly YELLS - "GODDAMN F*CKING PHONE, F*CK YOU, F*CK YOU YOU PIECE OF F*CKING SH*T, F*CK!"...*Click*...

Me - "Okay then..........."

Wow. Just...wow.
Just had a call with a guy who truly acted like a 2 year old. I am still reeling...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, I got this letter saying that I haven't paid you guys my money?"

*I bring up the policy, look thruogh it all...*

Me - "Okay sir, so yes, I can see here that you missed your last payment, once that one has been paid and your policy is up to date, you'll be able to claim again. Would you like me to transfer you through to our payment department to get that taken care of?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, put me through"

Me - "Sure, no problem sir. Just be aware though that it takes at least one working day for the payment to hit your policy, once that payment reflects on your policy, you'll be able to claim again as normal. I'll just pop you through now..."

*interrupts me...note, his voice suddenly becomes soooo WHINEY...I'm talking, like a 3 yr old kid who you have just told is not allowed to have any lollies...I am thrown by just how childish and whiney it is, it's hard to describe...*

Stupid Customer - "NOOOO, but I want to claim NOWWWWW! Noooo, nonononono arghhhhhh! Noooo! I don't wanna waaaaait, arghhhhh!"

Me, after I pick my jaw up off the floor - "Ah, okay sir. Well, I do apologise for any inconvenience this may cause, but we do not use real timeprocessing so the very earliest a payment can reflect on your policy is one working dayl that is written on all of our payment reminders and bills, so that you are aware to allow for that one day for standard bank processing so that you don't find yourself waiting to claim. You can lodge any claims you have pending once the payment hits the policy sir, this doesn't mean you can't claim at all, it just means you have to wait one day for the payment to reflect on your policy. You will still get any rebate you are entitled to"

Stupid Customer - "Arghhhhhhhhh nononononono, ugh! NO! I wanna claim right now, NOW! I'm not hanging up until you fix this, now! ARGHHHHH! This is ridiculous, I pay you for service and I'm not getting any! I wanna claim now! Wanna claim now! Wanna claim now! Nownownownownownow!"

Me - "I'm sorry sir, regardlessoof how many times you repeat yourself, the facts remain the same - we have to wait for the bank to clear and then send the payment to us. Given the banking system we use, it is not possible to have this happen any earlier than 1 working day from the day you pay"

Stupid Customer - "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

*Yes. He made a 'waaaah' sound. LIke a baby. Wah*

Me - "Okay sir...so would you like me to put you through to our payment department?"

Stupid Customer - "Wanna claim, wanna claim, wanna claim, wanna claim"

Me - "Okay, well as advised, that is not going to possible until the payment reflects on your policy. The facts of the matter will not change. The sooner you pay, the sooner you will be able to claim. Would you like me to transfer you through?"

Stupid Customer - "Where's your manager?"

Me - "At this time sir, I believe he would be halfway home. This is not, however, a matter that can be escalated. Our managers do not take escalations where the information they would provideis the same that you have already been given"

Stupid Customer - ""But. I. Want. To. CLAIM! CLAIM! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. Now! I'm not hanging up till I can claaaaaaaaim, arghhhhhhhh"

Me - "Okay sir. Well that is your choice, but I do need to advise you that I have other people calling in who have been waiting on hold for some time now, from what you're saying there I don't believe I can assist you any further today, if there is nothing I can actually help you with I'm going to have to end this call so I can assist other people, okay sir?"

Stupid Customer - "No! Nononononono! ARGGGGGGH, I wanna claim, ugh! UGH! WAAAAAAH. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. Wah wah wah, WAHHHH"

Me - "Okay sir, you have a great evening now"... *CLICK*


I'm telling you, I've spoken to plenty of whiney people in my time. But that guy took the cake. BY A MILE.
I really cannot explain or describe it enough - when I say he whined like a little baby, that is LITERALLY what he was doing. He was 100% fine and normal at the start of the call, and then all of a sudden, BAM. Soon as he heard something he didn't like, off he went.
Wow. I'm still shocked by it.

Even worse - he had a wife and kids on his policy. He was allowed to reproduce?! Oh hell no, that sh*t should have been banned...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, can you tell me where I am?"

Me - "Um...I don't think I quite get what you mean ma'am. This is Health Insurance Inc that you've called?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah. Where am I?"

Me - "Well...you've come through to the call centre for Health Insurance Inc..."

*interrupting me*

Stupid Customer - "No no, I know where I've called, I'm asking you WHERE AM I?!"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am, I don't understand what you mean."

Stupid Customer - "*SIGH*...I'm standing infront of a building with a weird shaped eagle looking symbol on the front, there is a pizza shop behind me, I'm about 5 minutes away from a cab stand, I just need to know where I am, god!"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am, I really wouldn't have a clue..."

Stupid Customer - "Well you're a whole lotta help then aren't you!"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am. I can only realise assist with health insurance enquiries"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, and you do directory assistance too!"

Me - "Uh...no ma'am, no, this is just health insurance"

Stupid Customer - "And directory assistance!"

Me - "No...????"

Stupid Customer, suddenly yelling - "YOU DO DIRECTORY ASSISTANCE TOO!"   *CLICK*

The scary thing about this post? This is NOT the first time this has happened...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Hi, can I please have your phone number?"

Me - "Sure sir, which phone number were you after, was it for one of our branches?"

Stupid Customer - "Branches? Nah, I need the phone number for the call centre"

Me - "Oh, well we only have the one call centre sir, it's just us here"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah. What's your number please?"

Me - "Um...well...you just called it sir"

Stupid Customer - "Oh. Yeah"   *CLICK*

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, can I claim?"

Me - "I'll have a look for you sir...what service were you wanting to know if you can claim on?

Stupid Customer - *CLICK*

Okay then...

1 minute later...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, I wanna know if I can claim?"

*Yes, it's the same guy*

Me - "I can check for your sir but I need to know what service you are wanting to know if you can claim on or not?"

Stupid Customer - *CLICK*

1 minute later...

Colleague seated near me - "Sure sir, I can check that for you. Which service were you wanting to know is claimable or not? Sir? Hello? Sir? Okay then..."

1 minute later...

Other colleague seated near me - "Hi sir, sure let take a look. Now which service were you enquiring about today? Hello? Hey! That guy just hung up on me!"

Yet another colleague near us - "Yes sir...okay...okay...alright so you want to lodge a complaint about a few of the staff here...they refused to help you? Okay....okay...well I mean, we would need to know what service it is that you were asking about, otherwise we have no way of checking anything for you sir...hello? Sir? Hello sir, are you there?"


Yeah. Weird.

A colleague who sits near me just had a convo with a customer who called in... because he sits so close and I wasn't on a call myself at the time, I heard it all. It sounded like a normal, calm, pleasant convo - my colleague was telling this guy that if he paid his policy via credit card it would not reflect immediately, all payments hit the policy the next working day.

Literally about 2 minutes after his call ended, I get this...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Hi, my husband  just called you earlier a minute ago and the guy he spoke to was incredibly rude and horrible to him! We got a letter saying our policy was overdue and we needed to pay it, and the guy he spoke to said he wasn't allowed to pay! He abused my poor husband, he screamed and yelled at him and would not let him pay! I'm his wife!"

Me - "Er....okay ma'am. That sounds very ...unusual. I'll bring up your policy and take a look"

*I bring up the policy and yup, sure enough, I am speaking with the wife of the guy my colleague just spoke with*

Me - "Okay ma'am, so I can see the policy and the notes from the last conversation...so just to clarify, it was your husband that called? Did he have the phone on loud speaker or something?"

Stupid Customer - "No, it wasn't on loud speaker, I didn't get to hear it. I normally handle everything to do with the insurance so he doesn't have to deal with people like you, and the one time I do let him call, this happens! He had called in just wanting to make a payment, to actually GIVE you guys money, and he comes back to me very upset because the man he spoke to abused him and told him that he is not allwoed to pay!Seee! This is why I normally shield him from you, you people are horrible!"

*NOTE - the husband is almost 40 yrs old. The fact that this encounter has 'upset' him, combined with the fact that his mouth is quite clearly sucking firmly on her t*ts, is making it very hard for me not to LOL right in her ear...*

Me - "Okay ma'am, I'm sorry to hear that the conversation upset him. I must say though. I have the notes on the policy here and I actually sit opposite the gentleman your husband spoke to. I'm sorry but all your husband was told was that we can take a credit card payment from him if he likes but we just want to mention to him so he is aware, that the payment will not actually reflect on the policy till the next working day, as we don't use real time processing. it goes through overnight. I was present for the entire conversation and I am sorry but that it all that was stated, and my colleague said this in a calm and polite manner. I'm not quite sure what your husband is doing, but the conversation that he mentions did not actually take place. We record all calls and can even send you a copy of the recording if you like?"

Stupid Customer - "Oh....um...no, no...that's okay. I guess he was just...um...confused then"

Me - "Mmmm-hmmmm"

Stupid Customer - "So, um... I can just make that payment with you on the phone now then?"

Me - "Sure ma'am, let's get that through for you"


The sad thing is that this kind of rubbish does happen every now and then. Someone will either call back themselves, or get their partner or MUM to call back after they've just spoken with us, and will go on and on about how poor them, woe is them, they were just ABUSED and we were so RUDE! Each time it's like, dude, we are happy to send you the recording of the call if you want.
But seriously people...do these idiots not realise that if we actuallty did abuse and speak to incredibly rudely to customers like they claim we have done to them, that we would not only be fired on the spot, but most likely arrested as well?
Sheesh.

I don't know why this is, or where the superiority complex comes from, but 8 out of 10 people that call us from Drs rooms and hospitals chasing up 'outstanding' payments, are usually rude/out of line/patronising/snobby [the list goes on, but you get the idea].
9 out of 10 times, the paymemt is not actually 'outstanding'.
Case in point, I have had the below calls, all within the past HOUR:

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Nice to have someone finally answer the call..."

*I look at the call timer....she had been on hold for just 18 seconds*

Me - "Sorry for the delay ma'am, how could I help today?"

Stupid Customer - "I sent you people a hospital account for [membership details] 2 months ago and as usual, you stuffed it up. It was never paid. Bring it up and sort it out"

*I bring the membership up*

Me - "Okay...so I can see here that we actually paid that claim a month ago, and a payment advice was sent?"

Stupid Customer - "Oh...oh yeah, I see it now"...*CLICK*

_______________________________________________________________

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Good afternoon, I'm calling to chase up an overdue hospital claim payment. Can I just say that I'm sick of always having to call and chase these up with you people?"

*Once again I bring up the membership*

Me - "Thanks for holding ma'am. That claim has already been paid, it was paid on [date] which was actually 3 weeks before the due date. Have you checked the hospitals bank account?"

Stupid Customer - "No. I just assumed it was late because you people always pay them late"...*CLICK*

NOTE - I read through the notes on the policy and this woman calls in every single month, and pulls the exact same routine - saying we always pay claims late and she is sick of chasing us...every single claim has been paid weeks before the due date. They've never been late for that hospital

_____________________________________________________________

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Look this up [gives me membership details]

Me - "Okay ma'am, I've got that policy up, how could I help with that one today?"

Stupid Customer - *SIGH* "I wanna know why you havent paid [hospital claim], how long do we have to wait to get money from you? It's ridiculous!"

*I take a look...*

Stupid Customer - "Uh, ma'am? That payment was made to the hospital 6 weeks ago, and I can even see we received back the payment advice signed off confirming it was received?"

Stupid Customer - *CLICK*

__________________________________________________________

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "I'm calling about an overdue payment please"

Me - "Sure ma'am, I can help with that, what was the membership number?"

*I bring up the policy and have a look for the claim...while I am doing this, she says to me in a sickly sweet voice...*

Stupid Customer - "I hope you don't mind me saying, but your work really is a bit of a joke, don't you think? It's very unprofessional to not pay a claim like this, I'm suprised you're about to stay afloat, you must be on below minimum wage given the low wuality of service you offer. Do you even know what you're doing, hmmmm? I know that if I worked there, I would never let a claim slip under the radar like this, it's very unprofessional"

Me - "Okay. Well I can see here, ma'am, that this claim was actually already paid back on [date]. have you checked the payment advices, or the bank account?"

Stupid Customer - *I hear her typing on her end* "Oh...there it is...thanks!"...*CLICK*

_______________________________________________________________________

WTF.
I mean, if there had actually been a claims error, I can understand the frustration.
Even more so, if it was a place where we had a history of making mistakes with claims, then absoutely, I would be mad too.
But in ALL of these cases - like it usually is - there had never been an issue or delay with claims for the hospital/DRs room in the past, the claims had already been paid [in some cases, long ago], and it seemed each time the people just hadnt bothered actually looking if the claim had been paid?
I mean, I can even understand if you hadn't looked and were just wanting to check - that's fine!
But to call in with attitude like that, and to be so rude...nope.
Uncalled for, and just shows how unprofessional THEY are...

This call was actually nothing much out of the ordinary, but I thought I would post it anyway, as it's a good demonstration of the type of call I get about once every half an hour.
ATTACK OF THE IDIOTS WHO DO NOT LISTEN!!!

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Hi,  I just wanted to double check something. My surgeon has given me a quote and I wanted to see if it was correct"

Me - "Sure ma'am, let's take a look"

*I bring up her policy details etc*

Me - "Okay so what does the quote say there?"

Stupid Customer - "It says total fee payable by patient $738. Is that how much I have to pay?"

Me - "There should be a section below right below that ma'am, it will say either inclusive or exclusive of health fund rebate?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, I see it. It says inclusive"

Me - "Right. So the DR has already factored in how much the health fund will pay back, so yes, your out of pocket expense to pay the DR yourself is $738"

Stupid Customer - "Okay. So how much the health fund paying?"

Me - "Well, if you look in the bottom right hand corner of the account there ma'am, there should be a section that gives you a detailed breakdown?"

Stupid Customer - "Oh yeah, yeah I see it. It says total fee $1820...health fund rebate $1082...patient out of pocket expense $738"

Me - "Okay, that's the one, that gives you the detailed breakdown"

Stupid Customer - "But...what do I have to pay?"

Me - "Um...well ma'am, you just pay $738 to the DR. The health fund pays the balance"

Stupid Customer - "Okay. But how come the health fund isn't paying anything towards this? I've had health insurance for years!"

Me - "Uh...ma'am, if you just refer to that section in the bottom right hand corner again...you can see there that the health fund is paying $1082 towards this procedure"

Stupid Customer - "Right. But...like...what do I pay though?"

Me - "You pay $738 ma'am"

Stupid Customer - "None of this makes any sense. I just want to know what I have to pay"

Me - "You have to pay $738 ma'am"

Stupid Customer - "You keep saying that, but how come I have insurance then? I'm paying for nothing!"

Me - "Ma'am, the Dr's total fee is $1820. The health fund is paying $1082 of that. You pay the remaining $738"

Stupid Customer - "I don't get it"

Me, eye twitch - "Okay, that's ok ma'am, we can talk through. Which part were you a bit confused with?"

Stupid Customer - "All of it"

Me - "Okay. So basically..."

*she talks over me*

Stupid Customer - "Look just forget it okaty. I think I'm just going to cancel, I don't see why I bother having insurance if I can't ever claim anything back"... *CLICK*

Um. Okay then??

PS. I want to say hello to Mona, who reads and comments on the blog here - I still haven't worked out how to reply to the actual comments , but please know that I read every single comment that everyone makes and Mona, I love hearing from you!! :) thanks for taking the time to read and leave your feedback, you're awesome :)

All day this rude woman had been calling in over an over - she had been knocked back on a claim because she hadn't paid her policy in about 6 mths, so her policy had been cancelled [yes, another one of the ones where she was amazed to hear that, omg, I actually have to pay  to have insurance! No way! Ugh.
So anyway, she had called in so many times that her name had become known around the office, and I recognised her phone number.

So I get an inbound call, and can see it is her number...
it;s nearing the end of my shift, I'm tired and over it, and she just wont let up with the ass-clownery, so I decided that if anything, I was going to make the call 'interesting'...I was not ever once 'rude', but I decided to act dumb the whole time...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes! Now you listen, I've had to waste my time and call in many times today. I've got a problem and you WILL fix it for me, otherwise I tell you what, I'll have your job!"

Me - "Oh okay. Well I'm sorry ma'am, but there aren't actually any positions that are currently open"

Stupid Customer - "What?"

Me - "Well you said you'll have my job, but I like my job and have no plans to leave, so my own job isn't available, and as far as I'm aware there aren't any other positions free either"

Stupid Customer - "I don't want to work there! I have a problem!"

Me - "I'm sorry to hear that ma'am"

Stupid Customer - "So are you going to help me or what?"

Me - "With your problem ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes!"

Me - "Well, I'll do my best. What was the problem that you have ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "You idiots knocked back my claim!"

Me - "I can't see that ma'am"

Stupid Customer - "What? I've been calling you people all day about this stuff up and now you're telling me you can't see it?!"

Me - "That's correct. You haven't given me any of your details yet ma'am, so right now I'm staring at a blank screen, so I can't see your problem. What was your membership number?"

Stupid Customer - "Oh. My. God. Okay, the number is..."

*she gives me all her details, though of course I already had the policy up since I knew who was calling*

Me - "Okay ma'am, so your policy has been closed for months due to non-payment, and obviously you can't claim on a closed policy. So what seems to be the problem today ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "That's it! THAT's the problem! You idiots tried telling me that I have to PAY to keep my policy!"

Me - "That's right ma'am"

Stupid Customer - "Well I disagree!"

Me - "I'm sorry to hear that"

Stupid Customer - "I don't have any money!"

Me - "Really? Neither do I, I left my wallet at home today. It's been terrible. I had to borrow money to get my lunch"

Stupid Customer - "I don't care!"

Me - "Really? I wish I was a care free as you about having no money ma'am, I've been stressing about it!"

Stupid Customer - "No, I mean, I do care, but not about you!"

Me - "Well that's okay ma'am, I mean we aren't friends or anything so I suppose I can't really expect you to care about my situation, that's fine"

Stupid Customer - "Um...yeah, but whatever! So can we get back to my problem?"

Me - "Sure thing ma'am, but I mean, I can't loan you any monoey or anything"

Stupid Customer - "What?"

Me - "Well, you said your problem was that you had no money, and you want to talk about it with me , so I just wanted to let you know right away that I don't ahve any money to lend you!"

Stupid Customer - "What? No! My problem is that you idiots didn't pay my claim!"

Me - "Oh, okay. Well I mean, like I said, your policy has been closed for months, so that matter isn't really up for discussion, so I can see why you would be upset but I don't see how it's a 'problem' as such? How did you want me to help you today ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "Pay my f*cking claim!"

Me - "Oh, I'm sorry ma'am, we don't pay towards those types of services"

Stupid Customer - "What?"

Me - "We don't pay towards those ma'am. If you want I can send you a brochure so you can read through our products and choose one to re-join on?"

Stupid Customer - "What? I don't want to re-join!"

Me - "Oh okay, well thanks for calling then ma'am, you have a lovely afternoon"

Stupid Customer - "What? Oh, f*ck it"... *CLICK*


Hehe.
Yes, yes, I know. I'm evil. But seriously people. All day, over and over, she kept calling and abusing the living hell out of my colleagues, including making racial slurs and making threats of bodily harm. And don't even get me started on her thinking she didn't have to pay for health insurance...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurane Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer, yelling - "Well nice to see someone decided to FINALLY answer my call! I've been on hold for almost half an hour!"

*I look over at the very accurate call timer*

Me - "Okay ma'am, I've got it saying you've been on hold for just under 3 minutes...how can I help you today?"

Stupid Customer - "Well your computers are broken the because I've been on hold for almost an hour, this is ridiculous!"

*An hour? Wasn't it just half an hour?Already my eyes are about to roll out of my head, I'm rolling them so much right now...*

Me - "That's very unusal ma'am, aside form the previous call I was on, there was actually no-body else calling our lines for the 20 minutes or so prior to that, so I'm not quite sure how you ended up on hold for such a lengthy period of time? In any case, now that you're gotten through, how could I help you today?"

Stupid Customer - "I spoke to a girl there earlier today and she toldme I would have my rebate paid into my account immediately! Well, I'm looking at my account online as we speak, and the money isn't there, so get her back on the phone so she can explain herself and get this sorted out right away!"

*I take down her details, bring up her policy, read through all the notes...*

Me - "Okay ma'am, so I can see that you had called in earlier today regarding a claim you had sent us for dental work that wehad sent back declined?"

Stupid Customer - "That's the one! You people made a horrible mistake there, so I called in and let you know how imcompetent you all are, and the girl I spoke to apologised and said she will make the money would be in my account by this afternoon, and she was also going to make sure I was gievn $150 extra as compensation for you guys stuffing up"

Me - "Okay. Well ma'am, we do make notes of every conversation. the notes of your policy state that you called in this morning disputing the declined dental claim. You were advised that the reason the claim was not paid was because you do not hold any dental cover. The notes indicate that you that swore at and abused the agent you were speaking with. She notes that she asked you to stop wearing at you, you continued to do so, so she terminated the call. And that's the only note on the policy from today"

Stupid Customer - "Nar, that's bullsh*t, she's lying! She told me that I was 100% covered for dental and that you guys had stuffed up so she would get the money in my account today and also give me $500 compensation"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am, but that is not is noted on your policy. Furthermore, we would never advise that payment would be in someones bank account that same day as payment always takes several working days. In addition, we dio not have any facility to offer cash compensation? In any case, you've changed your version of events several times while we've been talking..."

Stupid Customer - "That's all bullsh*t! She told me all of this, she is just lying to you!"

*NOTE - the person she spoke with is a friend of mine and sits close by me. She also had no patience for lying idiots like this lady...*

Me - "Okay ma'am, well I mean, the person you spoke with actually sits quite close to where my desk is, and I can see she is there right now. I can trasnfer the call toher if you like and I'm sure she would be more than happy to discuss your version of events with her?"

Stupid Customer - "Huh? Nar, nar she will just lie again! Nar, I wanna speak to a manager!"

Me - "Okay ma'am, no a problem. I'll refer this to a manager for you"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, yeah good, refer it now 'cause I need the money today okay?"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am, as mentioned we have no facility for same day bank desposits. In addition, the manager will need to bring up and listen to the call you had this morning to verify what was said before they can proceed"

Stupid Customer - "What? Nar, they don't need to verify anything! Just pass it to a manager and get me my money today okay!"

Me - "Sorry ma'am, you're making an accusation that one of our staff members gave you false information over the phone, and then falsified the notes on your account. Both are quite serious, so a manager will need to review this thoroughly"

Stupid Customer - "I don't want the call listened to, just make them pay me the money today!"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am, the call will definetely need to be listened to"

Stupid Customer - *CLICK*


And so, for the millionth time, Ionce again make the comment that I DONT KNOW WHY PEOPLE MAKE THIS SH*T UP!
It tellls you straight up when you call us that the calls are recorded! What, do you think we have a message like that playing just for the sheer fun of it, huh?

Dumbsh*ts

I get this kind of all faaaaar too often...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah I was at the physio today and my card didn't, can you look to see why? I don't understand!"

Me - "No problem ma'am, let's take a look"

*I bring up her policy...*

Me - "Thanks for waiting ma'am. Okay, so the reason your card was declined is because your policy is not up to date, it was due for payment a month ago now, you cannot claim while your policy is overdue"

Stupid Customer - "What do you mean?!"

Me - "Well I mean, you took out the policy about 6 weeks ago and we are still waiting to receive your first payment. But it's ok, you can put in the claim after you've paid the policy and it's up to date, it just means that..."

*interupts me*

Stupid Customer - "Huh? What do you mean I have to pay for the policy?!"


Yeah. B*tch thought - in all seriousness - that you just take out health insurance and it's there for free.

And I get that EXACT same type of call every few days
"What do you mean I have to pay to have insurance?!"
"What do you MEAN I can't claim if I haven't paid? I demand you pay for my claim right now or I will go the the media!"
"Huh? No-one told me it costs money to have health insurance!"

These kinds of calls make me weep for humanity, they really do....

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Eh, eh yo, so I got dis letter yesterday sayin' that you gone closed ma policy for fraud and sh*t?"

*I bring up his policy - yep, sure enough, there are notes all over the place advising that all the receipts he had been sending us looked dodgy as all hell and so our fraud department called all the places he claimed the receitps were from, and not a single one of them had heard from him. he had been writing up his own receipts and claiming back [alot of] for services that never took place!*

Me - "Okay, thanks for holding sir. So yes, I can see that an investigation was launched and it was determined that for a number of months now, you have been submitting fraudulent receitps and claiming on services that never actually took place. As a result, as per our terms and conditions, your policy has been terminated and the monies obtained via fraud are required to be repaid"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah yeah yeah, I know all dat sh*t yo, I just be callin' to say I be suein' ya'll for discriminatin' bro!"

Me - "I'm sorry sir?"

Stupid Customer - "I be sayin' that I know I gone made up da receipts dat you all be talkin' bout with, but you only gone taken out dis action here against me 'cause I be a brutha, bro!"

Me - "I'm sorry sir, I don't follow. the fund took action due to a serious breach of terms and conditions, this would have been done with any member in your position?"

Stupid Customer - "Nar bro, nar, see if I wasn' bein' a brutha den there ain't no way youse be takin' out dis action here, see! It only be 'cause I be a brutha! So bro, I den gotta be callin' you to let youse know dat you be discriminatin' against me just cause I be a brutha, so I gunna be suein' you bro through da courts, cause that ain't right yo, that ain't right, to be discriminatin' agaist someone just 'cause they be a brutha, yo"

Me - "Okay sir. Well, I'll make sure your comments are noted on your policy. You have a good day now"...*CLICK*


That dude be f*cked, yo

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Hi, I'm just calling to change my payment method, at the moment you debit from my credit card each month but I want to change that so I just send you guys a money order"

Me - "I'm sorry sir, we no longer accept payments via money order. If you don't wish to continue paying your policy via a credit card debit, you can change to a bank account debit, mailing in a cheque, or paying online with a bank transfer or a card payment that way"

Stupid Customer - "Oh okay"

Me - "Yeah, sorry about that sir. So would you like me to change your payment method for you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah"

*silence*

Me - "Okay....and which payment method would you like me to change it to for you sir?"

Stupid Customer - "I want to send a money order each month thanks"

Me - "...... I'm sorry sir, as mentioned, we can no longer accept payment via money order. I can change your payment method to any of the other options I've just gone through though if you like?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes please"

*silence*

Me - "Okay sir..and which other payment method do you choose?"

Stupid Customer - "Money order please"

Me - "Sir, we do not accept payment via money order"

Stupid Customer - "Oh"

Me - "Would you like me to to change your payment method to bank debit, cheque payment, or paying via the internet with a card or transfer?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes please"

*silence*

Me - "Which one do you want me to change it to sir? Cheque payment, bank debit, or paying via the internet with a card or transfer?"

Stupid Customer - "Ummmm....okay, can you pleae change it to money order?"

Me - "No sir, we do not accept payment via money order"

Stupid Customer - "Oh, okay. I didn't know"


Come on people. Surely it is not normal that it's only 8 in the morning, and already I want to go and play in traffic.
*SIGH*

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "My son on our family membership is getting is wisdom teeth out next week and I just called to double check that the whole thing will be all be covered, I mean, I'm pretty sure it is but I just want to double check you know?"

*I'm already prepping at this point for a call gone bad because I've NEVER seen a wisdom tooth removal end up being 100% covered, so she is about to get a shock...havniiing said that, ALL of the policy info we sent them clearly states what is and is not covered, so that is going to be interesting as well...*

Me - "Sure ma'am, just bear with me for one moment and I'll run a check on your policy"

*I bring up her policy, have a look...and it's all going to go downhill from here*

Me - "Thanks for waiting there ma'am. Okay so unfortunately, you do not actually have any dental cover at all, so you will not be able to claim anything back on this unfortunately"

Stupid Customer - "I beg your pardon?!"

Me - "You've never held dental cover ma'am. I'm sorry but you will not be able to claim towards your son' wisdoom tooth removal. You can add dental cover if you like, but there would be a 12 month wait before that would actually kick in"

Stupid Customer - "What do you MEAN we cannot claim!"

Me - "Well ,as mentioned ma'am, you've never held dental cover, only basic hospital cover"

Stupid Customer - "Oh this is a joke, this is a joke..."

*she just keeps on repeating this...over and over...*

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am, but I mean, you were advised when you first took out your cover what services were and were not included, and then every year since then we send you this same information several times during the year, so you would have been well aware of what you can and cannot claim on all this time?"

Stupid Customer - No-body reads any of that rubbish that you send out!"

Me - "Okay, well I'm sorry that you have never taken the time to read what you can claim towards, but that doesn't change the fact that you have never held dental cover and as a result, wisdom teeth removal will not be claimable"

Stupid Customer - "This is ridiculous, your fund is a joke, you kow that right?"

Me - "I'm sorry, I don't see how this situation makes the fund a joke ma'am"

Stupid Customer - "You're happy to take our money each month but then as soon as we go to make a claim, you use every excuse in the book to weale out of paying us!"

Me - "Ma'am, health funds pay towatds services for which you are covered. If you ahve never paid for dental cover before, then naturally, you cannot claim on dental services"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah yeah, it's a joke. Anything to stop paying us!"

Me - "I'm sorry you feel that way ma'am, but it is the same for all health insurance - you can only claim towards something that you are actually paying for"

Stupid Customer - I want to speak to a manager"

Me - "I'm sorry, our managers here do not take escalations for complaints of this nature, the information they give you would be exactly as I've already told you. A manager cannot assist you with the fact that you failed to check what you were covered for all this time"

Stupid Customer - "You're all scammers, you know that? Happy to take our money but will do ANYTHING not to pay!"  *CLICK*


I get calls like that a fair bit.
Seriously. What the f*ck is WRONG with some people.

OHHHHH how I LOVE these calls.....

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer, RUDE & SARCASTIC tone - "OHHH, how nice that a REAAAAL person answered the phone for once, and not one of your ridiculous robots!"

Me, already unimpressed with how she is speaking to me - "We don't have automated answering systems here ma'am, a real person answers your call every time"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, whatever. Anyway, I'm calling to make a complaint, you people have stuffed up, as usual!"

Me - "Okay ma'am, what seems to the the problem?"

Stupid Customer - "I called in yesterday and the idiot girl I spoke to told me I would be completely covered when I went in for my massage today. WELL! I just finished my well deserved massage, went to pay, and I got NOTHING BACK! So. I don;t care what you have to do or who you have to speak with, but I expect this mess to be sorted out right now, and for the money I am owed to be in my hands by the end of the day"

Me - "Okay ma'am, I'll just bring up your policy and take a look"

*I bring everything up....and have a huge smile on my face as I go back to her*

Me - "Thanks for waiting ma'am. So just to confirm, you say you spoke to a girl yesterday and she tld you that your massage would be 100% covered, is that correct?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes! That stupid girl stuffed it up and I expect compensation for that!"

Me - "Right. Well that was actually ME that you spoke with ma'am, and I do now recall that conversation quite clearly, and I have also made notes of what I told you. I advised you that you had reached your limit for this year for massage and any massages you get done prior to 1 Janruary 2012 would not be claimable, you woudl get nothing at all back. I've noted that you swore and stated that that was a joke and that you felt that you were untitled to unlimited massage year round. I advised you again that your limit had been reached, and repeated that any massage you got prior to 1 Janruary 2012 would not be claimable at all. At no point did I state that you would be 100% covererd. Now, as you know, all calls are recorded, I've just now made further ntoes of what you are telling me now, and I'm sure a manager would be happy to review our call form yesterday, but that is up to you ma'am. Would you like me to get a manager to listen to that call?"

*CLICK*, as she then hung up.

Yeah. You just got owned, b*tch.
Once again , I will make the comment that our customers are advised at the start of each call that it is being recorded.
WHY they then try and lie is absolutely beyond me.
Have some people no shame?

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Hi, I was just needing to know, after I have my surgery next week, how do I claim it back and like, how much is it going to cost me?"

*I bring up his policy, get all the details of the surgery etc - all is well, this one is reaaaally straight forward"

Me - "Thanks for waiting sir. Okay, so you have the highest cover available for this type of surgery, so the health fund will actually be covering the full cost. You wont be required to pay anything yourself. The hospital you're going to has an agreement with the fund, where they don't require any payment upfront. I can see they have already contacted us and verified this with us. When you go in for your surgery, you simply need to sign in at admissions. When you're discharged they will then give you a two page document that will be stapled together and is titled 'claiming through your fund'. You will just need to take that document down to the fund branch nearest you - and I can see there is one located about 2 minutes away and you have claimed through there before - and hand that in over the counter and give them your name membership number. then we pay the hospital direct. No out of pcket expense to you at all sir"

Stupid Customer - "Huh?"

Me - "Okay sir. You don't have to pay anything yourself. You just go into hospital, get your surgery done, and when you are discharged, you take the 2 page-document they give you down to our branch and hadn it in over the counter and give them your name and membership number, and we take care of all of the payment for you"

Stupid Customer - "None of that makes sense. Can you maybe explain things in a way that ACTUALLY makes sense?"

Me - "Okay sir, so just to clarify, which part were you a little confused with?"

Stupid Customer - "You keep saying I don't have to pay anything. I asked you how much I have to pay. I didn't think what I was asking was really that difficult to understand, but hey, I could be wrong..."

Me - "I'm...sorry sir. I did actually answer your question. You asked how much you have to pay for this surgery , and I advised that because of your high level of cover, you don't actually have to pay anything for it. The health fund is paying 100% of the cost. You pay nothing sir"

Stupid Customer - "I don't get it"

Me - "Okay. Well. I'm just trying to figure out a different way to explain this then..."

Stupid Customer - "here's a suggestion - how about you stop talking rubbish, and just tell me the exact dollar aount that I will be paying for this surgery, or is that too hard for you?"

Me - "You will be paying zero dollars sir"

Stupid Customer - "Do you understand what I'm asking?"

Me - "I believe so sir? You're asking me how much you are going to have to pay the hospital for this surgery?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes! Exactly! Finally, you switched your brain on! So, how much?"

Me - "Sir, you wont have to pay anything to the hospital for this surgery, the health fund is covering the entire cost for you"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah okay, thanks for nothing, useless cow".....*CLICK*


Really?
I mean....REALLY?!
Don't get me wrong folks, I KNOW that health insurance can be damn confusing at times, it is unnecessarily complex.
HOWEVER
When you ask how much something will cost you, and I tell you it will cost you nothing, zip, not a dollar, your lovely health fund is paying 100% of the cost for you...I do expect you to be intelligent enough to be able to comprehend that!
WTF!

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "I'm calling to upgrade my cover"

Me - "Sure, did you now whicb cover you were wanting to move up to?"

Stupid Customer - "No"

Me - "No worries ma'am, we can discuss the options. Did you ahve an idea of which services you were wanting to add to your current policy?"

Stupid Customer - "Nup"

Me - "Okay then. Hmmm. Well I mean I can definetely talk you through all the options and if you let me know what interests you, we can go from there?"

Stupid Customer - "Nar"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "I don't have anything in mind. Just upgrade me"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am it doesn't quite work like that. There are a large number of different higher covers you can upgrade to, with a fair few variations and combinations on offer. We would need something a little more specific to be able to mvoe you up"

Stupid Customer - "Nar"

Me - "Okay, well I'm not able to just pick a random polucy for you and make the hange on your behalf, so I might have to send you a product brochure and also suggest you refer to our website for further information. After you'd had a look and have a better idea of what cover you may be interested in, if you were to call us back then, we would be more than happy to assist you"

Stupid Customer - "Nar, let's just do it now"

Me - "Okay ma'am, not a problem. Bear with me for one moment and I'll bring up a list of the policies available to you at this time"

Stupid Customer - "Nar I don't wanna talk about anything, just upgrade me"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am, as I've advised before, I'm not able to randomly pick a policy for you and upgrade your health insurance on your behalf"

Stupid Customer - 'Just don't worry about it, I'll call back and speak to someone who knows what the f*ck they're doing'...*CLICK*

Yeah.
F*ck off, you vague dumbsh*t loser.
I should have asked for her bank account number so I can go down to the bank and deposit a few bucks, so she can go and buy herself a f*cking clue.

The sad thing?
I get this type of call ALL the time.
Idiots calls in wanting to make cover changes to their healt insurance, which is a big deal people.
But they have NO f*cknig idea what they want. None at all.
They waste 10 minutes of my life while they sit there and mumble through some incoherent cr*p about nothing.

This was my first call today, and already I want to jump out the window.
Damn, people, damn.

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer, yelling - "I've had to call in 5 times now in the last day alone about a goddamn ambulance account that I sent you people, you said you paid it but the ambulance company sent me a reminder and so I checked with you again and you LIED and told me agai it wa salready sent! I DEMAND a manager right now, I am going to SUE you people for lying to me, I'm going to sue you and then come down and meet you all outside your offices and teach you a thing or two, how DARE you people f*ck me around like this!"

*While this customer is cra*ping on , I'm reading through the notes on his policy. Yep, he has indeed called over and over since yesterday about this ambulance claim. I can see the claim itself - it was deinfetely paid. I can see too that the 1st time he called, we already told him we would get a manager to call the ambualnce company direct to confirm they had received our payment and see why they sent him a reminder. Every time he called back after that, we repeated the same thign - we have it as paid, but a manager is trying to get through to the ambo comany direct to confirm. the last two times he called, we told him that we had gotten through and an ambo rep woudl be getting back to us this morning. Yet he just kept on calling and threatening and abusing...*

Me - "Okay sir, so I can see here..."

*talks over me*

Stupid Customer - "Don't you OKAY me! Every time I've called you people you LIE! I'm f*cking SICK of it! You're a f*cking useless dog and I should come on down there and put you in your f*cking place!"

Me, in a super sweet calm polite voice - "Of course sir. Now, I can see that each time you called us, we did advise you a manager was looking into this. There was a note place don the account about 15 minutes ago , where that manager was advised by [the ambo company] that they DID receive our payment for that account, and that the reminder notice was sent to you in error, they said it was a system error on their part and they do apologise for that. I can also see that we had already advised you we would call you once we had an outcome, and that manager had left a note she would be doing that within the hour - I will let her know you have already called back. So the matter has been resolved and as we intially advised you, we did in fact pay that account , and the error did in fact lie with the ambualce company. Now, was there anything else I can help with you today?"

*CLICK*, as he hangs up


I have to add - usually, we never really venture nito that grey area of 'blaming' other companies etc for things.
In this instance though, we had notes where the ambo company in question had told the customer straight up that our funds were 'liars' and 'incompetent' - I've deal with them before, and they had acted the same way then.
Add that to the inexcusably RUDe manner in which this man-child was carrying on, and you get my response.

And for the record, to date, he hasn;t yet called back. I figure it'll take a while for the sting to leave his face after he was just bit*ch smacked, YO ;)

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer,  in a very rude tone "Yeah I wanna update the address and also find out what we get back on my daughter's dental work"

Me - "Sure sir, I'll just bring up the policy"

*I bring it up - he is listed just as spouse and it is noted that onyl the wife, the policy holder, can make changes to the policy and contact details*

Me - "Okay sir, so I'll be able to help you with the dental enquiry, but for the address we will need to speak to your wife to get that oen updated, as per the notes on the policy"

Stupid Customer - "LOOK, don't you start wasting my time, you hear! I'LL give you the new address, I'm not stuffing around getting my wife to do this and that, this is MY policy"

Me - "I'm sorry sir, but no this is not your policy. It is your wife's policy. And she has advised us that only she will be able to make such changes. I need to mention sir, that I can see numerous notes on the policy here where you have attempted to change details on the policy before, and each time we have told you the same thing, that only your wife can make these changes. Now, what was the dental enquiry that you had there today?"

Stupid Customer - "I'm not happy, I'll tell you that now...but anyway...my daughter is getting braces, how much will they cost me?"

Me - "Well sir, I mean, I can tell you that the health fund will give you a $2000 rebate, you will need to let the dentist know this and then he or she will be able to tell you the remaining cost payable by yourself"

Stupid Customer - "So what does that mean"

Me - "Well...it means, sir, that you can claim $2000 back form the fund. You can get that back in one lump sum, or in installments, however you pay the dentist yourself, basically. For example, if you pay them $2000 or more upfront, you send us that receipt and we then refund you that fund amount, and that is the maximum claimed back. On the other hand, if you choose to pay in installments, for example, $200 a week, then you just send us those receipts and we would pay back that $200 a week until you have reached $2000 in total back from the fund"

Stupid Customer - "You're not making any sense. I said braces. BRACES. You hear me? I asked you how much they're gonna cost me. I'm not sure what's wrong with you, it's a simple question":

Me - "Okay, well I can see if I can do the sums for you if you're unable to sir. How much are they charging for her braces? And what payment plan have you setup with them? Are you paying in one go, or in installments?"

Stupid Customer - "What the f**k is wrong with you?! I don't know any of that! They just said she needs braces, and I'm calling you so YOU can tell me how much they're going to cost me! for f**k sake, it's not hard!"

Me - "I'm sorry sir, are you asking me to tell you how much the dentist is giong to charge you? I can only tell you that the fund will pay back a maximum $2000, but nobody other than the dentist can tell you what they will be charging, the fee is decided patient to patient"

Stupid Customer - "So what do you do all day? You sit there on your a*s staring at the screen? Huh? What's wrong with you? None of this makes sense. I just need you to tell me what the dentist will be charging!"

Me, deadpan voice now - "I'm sorry sir but you've called Health Insurance Inc. We have no direct affiliation with the dentist, they are a private practice. I can only advise you what the HEALTH fund pays back on braces. I cannot comment on what the independant DENTIST will choose to charge you and your daughter, they decide their fees, not the fund"

Stupid Customer - "Bullsh*t, that's BULLSH*T! Why do I pay for health insurance then, huh? Tell me! Why!"

Me - "Well, to be able to claim back on services that you are covered for sir?"

Stupid Customer -  "Yeah, and to serve me!"

Me - "Well, we can certainly help you with any queries you have that relate to this company and the policy you have, however we aren't able to help you with something that has, frankly, nothing to do with us. I suggest you contact the dentist and ask him dierct what he is choosing to charge"

Stupid Customer - "You've been very unhelpful, thanks!" *CLICK*

Ah-huh.
Bye bye, fu*cktard

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes, hello. I upgraded my policy a few months ago and I understand that I would need to serve a 12 month wait before I would be able to claim on pregnancy services?"

Me - "Yes, that's correct. 12 months from the date you upgraded"

Stupid Customer - "Right. So I was just calling to see if it's been 12 mths yet"

Me - "Oh...okay. And you say though that you upgraded just a few months back though?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah"

Me - "O...kay then. Let's take a look for you ma'am"

*I look at her policy*

Me - "Thanks for waiting there ma'am. Okay, so I can see that you upgraded back in August, so it's been about 3 months"

Stupid Customer - "Right. So have I served my 12 month wait yet?"


My eyebrows were raised so high during this call that I thought that they were going to fly right off the top of my head.
She was completely dead serious in what she was asking.
Something tells me that she should not breed ...

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - Hi, I'm calling from a Dr's room, I just need to check the cover on this patient's policy please"

*We check the cover, nice quick standard call, I think it's over but I wouldn't be posting if it had ofbeen that easy*

Stupid Customer - "Hey you, hey! Before you go, click on the net on your little computer there and download the instructions for online patient checking [*basically how to check the cover online on their end] and email it to me"

Me - "I'm sorry ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "I haven't done it that way in a while so I've forgotten how. Look it up for me, hang on , I'll just get you my email address"

Me - "Er, I'm sorry ma'am but I'm not able to stop my work to look up information that you need to do your job??"

Stupid Customer - "Well why not? It's not like your job is important, all you do is sit there on your a*s and talk to people all day. I work for a DOCTOR, my job is important. Now, you got a pen? I'll read out my email address..."

Me - "Again ma'am I apologise but I'm not able to download things from the internet and email them to you like that, I'm sorry"

Stuipd Customer - "You insurance people are getting more and more worthless every day!"

*CLICK*


Yeah, well, f*ck you lady.
It might be my job to sit on my butt and take calls all day, but at least I'm capable of actually doing my job. I don't need to ask random people to download self-help guides for me.
Dumba*s.

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "How much do I get back on dental?"

Me - "What type of dental do you want to check on sir?"

Stupid Customer - "Dental"

Me - "Yes sir, but what *type*. Fillings, check ups, crowns....?"

Stupid Customer - "Just dental"

Me - "Okay sir, well I'm afaird we have quite a few different dental categories and we would need to narrow it downa  bit if we are going to be able to assist you"

Stupid Customer - "Just give me an idea, what's the average"

Me - "I'm sorry sir, there is no 'average' because of how varied the dental cover is"

Stupid Customer  -"*SIGH* You're f*cking useless, you know that? It's not that f*cking hard! Just tell me the lowest and the highest!"

Me - "Okay sir. The lowest rebate is $8 and the highest is $3400"

Stupid Customer - "And how much would I get back?"

Me - "Again sir, we would need to know the *type* of dental work you were getting done to be able to tell you how much you would get back"

Stupid Customer - "What the f*ck is wrong with you?! Just tell me an amount! Just give me an average!"

Me - "Again sir I do apologise but given the very wide range of benefit payable, without knowing the TYPE of dental work you're talking about we cannot assist you, we need you to please narrow it down for us"

Stupid Customer - "Whatever, I'm just going to say that you told me it was all fully covered so you idiots will have to pay it all anyway, whaddya think of that!"

*CLICK* as he then hangs up

Okay sir. Well, I can tell you what I think of that. I think that right now I am loving the fact that these calls are recorded, and I am loving the fact that I just noted every one of your comments.
I also love that your dental claims are now going to be monitored.

Jacka*s

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "I'm calling because I'm trying to log into my online account and your stupid systems locked me out! Says I tried the password too many times or some bullsh*t"

Me - "Okay ma'am, I'll just bring up your policy and have a look for you"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah you do that, your systems a piece of sh*t"

*I bring up her policy...lo and behold...*

Me - "Thanks for waiting ma'am. Okay, so I'm not quite sure what's happened on your end there but your online access is not actually blocked? It's not showing any attempts to login either? That's a bit unusual, I've just logged an IT ticket for you so they can look into this for you, in the meantime though if you wanted to try it again now it may work?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, I just forgot my password and couldn't be bothered looking it up. That's your job. Look it up"

Me - "Oh. So the system didn't lock you out ma'am? Because, I mean, you said it did so I just logged a ticket for you..."

Stupid Customer - "Are you deaf? I just told you, no! I just couldn't be f*cked looking up my password, do your job and get it for me! God!"

Ah-huh.
F*ck you lady.  I should have made sure she WAS locked out of her account [I didn't of course, but I wanted to]

If she had of just called and said she forgot her password, I would have been more than happy to just look it up for her, no biggie, we all forget things.
No idea why she felt the need to lie and act like a b*tch.

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "How much do I get back on sunglasses?"

* I bring up his policy, ID him, go through the motions*

Me - "Okay sir, so you can claim back a maximum $350, but please bear in mind that you can only claim towards prescription sunglasses"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, they're not prescription but that's fine"

Me - "Oh, no I'm sorry sir, that's what I was just saying, you CAN'T claim on them if they are non-prescription. They must be prescription to be able to claim"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah I heard you, I know, but they aren't prescription but that doesn't matter, I'll claim them anyway"

Me - "I'm sorry sir but if you send in a claim like that it was be rejected"

Stupid Customer - "No it won't"

Me - "I'msorry sir, yes it will be"

Stupid Customer - "Well they're prescription then"

Me - "Okay. Well to claim on glasses sir, you have to include a copy of your prescription anyway. If they're prescription and the script is included, then you're fine to claim. If not, then the laim is rejected"

Stupid Customer - "Well who the f*ck are you? Why do you get to decide what I can and can't claim on?!"

Me - "It's not my decision sir, I'm simply relaying the fund rules to you so that know what to expect prior to lodging a claim"

Stupid Customer - "You're just being racist because I'm gay!"

Me - "Um...okay. I mean...okay, I do feel that I should point out that a person race and sexuality are two entirely separate things...neither of which would have anything to do with, well, anything...plus there would be no way of me being privvy to any such personal information anwyay sir, as I am merely talking to you over the phone"

Stupid Customer - "Whatever, you racist b*tch!"

Me - "Okay"

Stupid Customer - "I want a manager!"

Me - "Okay"

Stupid Customer - "Are you deaf?"

Me - "No sir"

Stupid Customer - "I want a manager!"

Me - "Yes sir. You stated that already. I'm afraid if you don't currently have a manager but you seek one, that is not something I can assist you with. I would suggest perhaps contacting your HR department about that?"

Stupid Customer - "Huh?"

Me - "Oh nothing sir [INSERT EVIL GRIN]. So you were asking to actually *speak* with a manager of mine, was it?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah! I'm gonna tell them what a racist b*tch you are!"

Me - "Okay. I apologise but our managers do not take complaints that are based on personal opinion"

Stupid Customer - "It's not my opinion, you're being racist because I'm gay! If I wasn't gay then you'd let me claim on my sunnies!"

Me - "Okay sir. What I'll do is pass this through and have a manager listen to this call, and then call you back with some feedback. Is that ok with you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, yeah get a manager to listen to this call adn then call me back and let me know what they think!"

Me - "Okay sir. I'll make sure that happens. Thanks for calling"

So, that was earlier today.
So far half the office has sat in to have a go at listening to that call. There's been plenty of feeback, but none of it is what I think he was quite hoping for ;)

Most customers, we are absolutely polite and professioanl with. As you would expect.
In instances like this, I'm sorry, but if you act like an a*s clown like this, then really, what else do you deserve?

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Yes, I got a letter from your company saying that you can't pay on my dentla claim until I send you the receipt for it"

Me - "Yes ma'am, that's right, we do require the receipt for a service before we can pay on it. Had you been calling to get the mailing address to send the receipt to? It's just the address on the letter itself?"

Stupid Customer - "No, I'm not calling to get the address. I know the address. I'm calling because I don't understand the letter"

Me - "Oh....oh okay. Well basically, as mentioned, it just means that for the fund to pay on a service, we have to receive from you the receipt for that service to verify that it took place, what the service was, how much it cost, you know, just the standard claim details"

Stupid Customer - "I've claimed with your company before, I'm not an idiot"

Me - "Oh okay, well, no-one was calling you an idiot ma'am. If you just forward that receitp to us then we can assess your claim for you"

Stupid Customer - "So what, you're not going to answer my question?"

Me - "Um...I'm sorry ma'am, I thought that I had. The letter is stating that you must send us the receipt for the dental visit that you tried to claim on, once we get that receipt, we can finish assessing your claim and then release the payment to you. As it states in the letter, if we do not receive the receipt then we cannot pay the claim"

Stupid Customer - "Yes, you've said that, but I'm asking you, what does that MEAN?"

Me - "I'm...really sorry ma'am. I'm not sure I quite understand what it is you're asking me then?"

Stuipd Customer - "*SIGH* ...well is there someone there who DOES know what they're talking about then?"

*It is late in the day and I am already over it...*

Me - "Sure ma'am, that's fine, just bear with me for one moment and I will get you a manager, ok?"

Stupid Customer - "Yeah, I think that's best, I don't really want to be speaking to a trainee"

*My manager comes to the line, and this is what I hear...*

Manager - "Hi ma'am...okay...okay...well I was sitting right next to [me] and yes, I did hear what she told you, what she said was correct...mmmhmmm....mmmhmmm....okay....okay well I'm sorry you feel that way...mmmhmm...okay...no ma'am, I'm sorry, that won't be happening"

Manager to me - "That crazy lady just hung up on me after I told her we wouldn't fire you for explaining the letter to her. She also said the letter was misleading, that no-one n their right mind would know what we meant when we said she must send her receipt to us to be able to claim"


What I say, is who is she to be talking about people in their 'right mind', when she is clearly not....hmmmm....

Me

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how can I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "I dunno, CAN you help me?"

*stupid laughter by the customer*

Me, rolling my eyes - "What was your enquiry today sir?"

Stupid Customer - "You'd like to know that, WOULDN'T YOU"

*more dumb laughter*

Me - "Well I do need to know the nature of the call to be able to assist you today sir"

Stupid Customer - "Yes, you'd really like to ASSIST me, I'm sure"

*more LOLs*

Me - "Sure, so how can I help?"

Stupid Customer - "Well can you, CAN you?"

*he keeps laughing*

Me - "I'm sure I can sir, if you would like to advise the query you have?"

Stupid Customer - "Sure? Sure? Sea shore, sea shore, we all play, by the sea shore!"

*he just keeps on laughing like a 2-yr old moron*

Me - "Okay. Was there anything I can actually help you with today sir?"

Stupid Customer - "I dunno, IS there?"

*of course, he LOLs a bit more*

Me - "Well that's up to you sir"

Stupid Customer - "Nar, it's not up to me, isn't it up to you to help people?"

Me - "Well that is my job sir"

Stupid Customer - "Yes, it IS your job, isn't it"

*LOLs continue*

Me - "Yes, yes it is. It's also my job to filter calls sir, and I don't believe that this call is going anywhere. Thanks for calling...."

*he interrupts me, suddenly reverting to a normal, serious voice*

Stupid Customer - "Wait wait wait WAIT! No, I gotta ask about a payment on a claim!"

Me - "I'm sorry sir, I'm required to end prank calls. Thanks for calling"

*CLICK*

Hehe. Somewhat evil of me, perhaps, given that he now has to wait on hold for another 15+ minutes to get back through.
However - waste my time and I will sure as hell waste yours.
Simple.
:D