One of the things that I get every single day - and which drives me crazy - are the dumba*s customers who call in, have no effing clue what they want or are on about, and ummm and ahhh through the whole call, full of awkward silences.
I have been at work about an hour and I have had this happen on 7 calls already. 7. That has got to be a record.

Me - "Welcome to Health Insurance Inc, how may I help you?"

Stupid Customer - "Ummm, yeah...uhhh...I need to...uhhh...can I just check...ummm....I have a policy and I want to, ahhh...my glasses, like, uhhhh, ummmmm"

Me - *thinking, oh for fu*k sake, get your sh*t together before you call!!* "dDid you want me to see how much you have left to claim for glasses ma'am?"

Stupid Customer - "Ummmm, yeah, ah-huh"

Me - "Sure, no problems. You have $100 left to claim on glasses"

Stupid Customer - "Ohhhhh....ummmm....yeah...."

Me - "Okaaaay. And was there anything else I can help with today?"

Stupid Customer - "..........."

Me - "Ma'am? Was there anything else I can help with today?"

Stupid Customer - "Ummmm.....ahhhhhh......."

Me - ".................."

Stupid Customer - ".................."

Me - "Okay then, nothing else I can do for you then?"

Stupid Customer - "Ummmm....ahhhhhh....ahhhhhh"

Me - "........."

Stupid Customer - ".........."

Me - "Okay, well thanks for calling in today"

Stupid Customer - "WAIIIIT wait wait wait, I got a question!!"

FML